Monday, January 18, 2010

The final hours

Well I think I can officially say I made it!!!!
I wanted to blog a few days ago about how stubborn I was and wanted to prove to everyone including the Dr's that I knew my body better then them, and that I would make it past the 14th.  Which was the orginally C-section date. I really wanted the 27th but there was no way the Dr's would allow that. And now I can see why and I honestly dont know if I would make it or not till then, just in the past day or two the pregnancy "feeling" of being done has really hit me.  My hips have been hurting/grinding, I am getting kicked in the ribs so its hard to breath, pressure on my back, the whole nine yards. Then again I wonder if the reason I have been feeling that is because I refused to let my body feel that way before and now that I know its over, I am giving in to my body's natural course. But anyway I didn't want to blog earlier in fear I would jinx myself.
The one thing I wanted to say was, I always made fun of my mom being a "freak of nature" when it came to pregnancy.  She never had any pregnancy symptoms, and the only way you could tell she was pregnant was the basketball shaped thing in the front.  My biggest thing is that the night before I was born she was playing tennis! To me that is just crazy and thought she was nuts for being able to do that. unfortunately I wont be able to compare my labor and delivery to her since I have to have a c-section, but she had no problems whatsoever and basically "popped us out" my brother and I both were quick. I always made fun of her but now I realize that maybe if I was only having one that I would be the same way.  I really haven't had a bad pregnancy at all. sure the heartburn caught me off guard and it typically was because of what I ate or what time I ate in relation to going to bed. I really haven't had any back problems, until a day or so ago, only within the last few weeks have I started swelling in the feet, but its quickly remedied by laying down with my feet up. Of course at first I was not used to my legs feeling heavy, so stairs would be a work out, but it was because of the amount of blood my body was trying to pump with two babies.  I didn't have any morning sickness, and really didn't start getting the "I'm always hungry" feeling till about two weeks ago, and it would be on and off. So I reflect now on the pregnancy and have to say that I feel very blessed and lucky to have such an easy pregnancy.
Now my recent feelings have been very difficult to describe. Of course I should feel so excited, and dont get me wrong I am but its being over shadowed by sadness. I know that is not a normal feeling, but after going through IVF and all the shots, tests, etc. I feel like I worked so hard to get pregnant, that the Dr is just going to take it away from me so fast. Of course all pregnancies come to an end, but its only the beginning of the rest of their and their babies lives, but its still hard to think of it that way. Do I want to stay pregnant forever?--Heck No. but just the thought that with IVF you are working to get pregnant and that is what you focus on is the intial getting pregnant, that you dont really think about doing IVF to get pregnant to have a baby type thought. So I have to admit this whole experience is a bittersweet one, I am so sad that my IVF journey is going to be over, but I am so happy my IVF journey will be over. Also I was nervous about the spinal block (the needle) but after my pre-op today and they explained how they numb the area so I wont really even feel the needle break the skin, I feel a lot better about that. The other item I am worried about is breastfeeding. Its the unknown factor, of course I want to try and breastfeed, but its that, what if my milk doesn't come in, or the kids dont want to take, etc. things I cannot control. Everything I have basically been able to control so having something that I am not able to control, makes me a  little worried.  Also I hate to say it, but I am glad I wont get much sleep the first night because I am so scared to spend the night in the hospital. I have never spent more than a few hours in a hospital, so staying over night just makes me a little upset.
Anyway.... I only have a few hours to go before my babies will be here, this will be so wonderful and of course I will put pictures up when I can.
One last parting picture of my being pregnant for the final time.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010


Ok so I think I have the nursery to a point I am semi satisfied with. I know most would think I would be in love with it, and its nice, but it's not exactly what I was wanting, but the hubby wanted to have a part so it was a combination of our visions I guess you could say.

Here is the changing table/dresser with my glider, that hubs actually picked the color. And he did the dot pattern.

This wall is a little plain, but I like it. The corner shelves hold our monitor and thermometer.
The art in the corners I did myself, here are close ups...

I really wanted something that had their names on it but didn't want the typical block letters handing over the crib or changing tables.

I didn't feel like moving my hospital bag and supplies out of the way of the picture, so sorry.

Here is another small wall that we put more dots on.

I think they have plenty of clothes to start off with, what worries me is that all the clothes we have are newborn, 0-3 months, and a few 3-6 months, and yes the dresser in the closet is also stuffed with clothes.

So the one thing I actually surprised myself with, was that I decorated more from a practicality stand point. I didn't buy cute little crib bedding, mainly because I couldn't find anything that was in bright colors, that wasn't themey, and would work for a boy and a girl, and worked with the bright green walls. So Since I needed a bumper I bought the breathable bumpers, but I think even if I would have found bedding I liked I would have got the breathable bumpers anyway. Then I didn't put too much on the walls, mainly because I didn't want anything hanging over the cribs that could fall on the kids, or above the changing table for the same reason, and there aren't really any other walls besides where I put the picture up makes sense to put up art. The word art I created will most likely get moved once they start standing in their cribs, but its also far enough away that they will have to really reach. The shelves are high enough that they wont be able to reach atleast not anytime soon, plus there was not way of getting around having something that would hold the baby monitor and to balance the room you need one on each side so I liked being able to use the other shelf for the thermometer.  Well sorry for the explination, just felt like it was warranted since the nursery didn't turn out exactly how I invisioned it, but its simple and bright and thats the main thing I wanted to accomplish.

6 days!!!!!

Well less than a week now. The question everyone ask is "are you excited? are you nervous" and the honest answer is no and no. I mean yes I am excited to a point, but I always thought I would be a lot more excited. I think it will hit once we are at the hospital. Well atleast I hope so. I think what is overshadowing the excitment is my nerves on the spinal block and staying overnight in the hospital. Yes, doing IVF and having to do all the needles you would think I would be ok with needles, but it actually had the reverse effect on me. I had no problem with needles before IVF, but doing three to four shots a day for over a month and then having Craig give me a shot for 13 weeks, was not helpful. So my fear is just feeling the needle. I am not concerned with the risks, like everyone worries about, I just worry about the pain of the shot. I have talked to some of my friends who had spinal blocks and they say you only feel the intial prick of the skin but thats it. So thats my first fear. Once the spinal block is done I will be so happy, and for the most part the whole day will be great. My next worry is the night time. I cant believe I am saying this but I am actually happy that I wont get much sleep, just because I have never spent more than a few hours in a hospital let alone spending several nights, so I am a little scared, but I am sure after the first night I will so tired, that I wont even think twice about sleeping in a hospital.
Well other than the worries, everything is going so well. I really have to say I have been very lucky. Especially with twins I really haven't had any problems, I think I do owe part of that to my Dr., who put me on unrestricted bedrest. I think it has made me go a lot longer. Also I think I owe it to genetics from my mom, who played Tennis the night before she delivered me-impressive.
I will work on getting my nursery pictures taken and uploaded, and give a little more "pregnancy" details.

Friday, January 8, 2010

36 weeks and 2 weeks to go.

So this week we went to our bio-physical exam.  Basically they check out the babies and give them a score out of 8.  Well Cayse and Price schored 8 out of 8 which is great for them and me.  What that means is that as of right now they dont have to move my C-section up because everything is going well.  Along with the scoring they can tell us roughly how much they weigh a piece and Caysen weighed 6lbs even and Price was 6lbs 7oz.  I think they are closer than that, just because the tech seemed a little newer.  She orginally measured Price and said she weight 6lbs 11 oz. and that is huge since only two weeks ago she weighed 5lb 2oz. so I asked her to check again and it came down. We hopefully go to Dr. Fumia (the specialist) next Wednesday and he will give us their weights again. I say hopefully one, because he had surgery this past week and should be back seeing patients next week, but if not I go to my normal OB and he will just check them out. I wont get to know the weights but I only have to wait a week before they are here anyway at that time.
So health wise I am doing pretty good. I have noticed the swelling in my feet and really my lower legs in general if I am up too long, but I have mastered getting the swelling to go down fast so I am ok with it. I also get tired a lot faster, which is so weird and actually an inconvience right now. I have so many things I need to get done before the babies come that I need unlimited energy to finish.  And believe it or not its not all baby things I need to get done, I actually have all of that under control-I think.  Its getting things ready for 2010. making the budget which we will need more than ever this year, organizing filing cabinet for 2010 bills, getting tax return stuff ready,etc. Plus I am on this huge cleaning fit right now, and that is really hard.  when I get these cleaning spells I can clean the whole house top to bottome, scrub baseboards, etc in roughly two days but I am lucky to get half a room done in one day and that is so frusterating!
Overall everything is going very well. I hope to put the lamp together today/tonite and then the nursery is finished-atleast enough to my half liking. so I will hopefully get pictures up soon. and sometime in the next week I will post a picture of my "final" belly picture.
So the offical count down begins Caysen and Price will arrive in 11 days!!!

School Closings

Ok I know I dont have kids, yet, but I have to share my opinion.
I remember growing up and you hear all the parents and grandparents saying "when I was a kid I walked two miles up hill in the snow to and from school". And remember thinking that they are crazy, and just making stuff up because they would never have to do something like that.
Well luckily I never had it rough at the bus stops, but still living in Missouri it did get cold. Hardly ever did we have school cancelled for snow or ice. And NEVER did we have school cancelled because it was too cold. 
All I have to say is what is happening to our society? I am not saying that its not cold outside, because it is, but there are several northern states that are colder than Oklahoma that kids still are waiting at bus stops and going to school, so why is Oklahoma any different? Yes its cold outside, but I remember as a kid I didn't think it was as cold as my parents did, because you are a kid so it wouldn't bother kids as much as adults, but really at this rate there have been so many reasons why schools have been closed that kids should be in school till atleast July. But that wouldn't happen either because they will cancel school because it is too hot. I do understand that some of the public schools around here dont have air conditioning so it would be a little hot, but they also have to think that not being in school there are a lot of kids that live in houses that dont have air conditioning.
Maybe when my kids get to school age I will change my mind, but for now I think its CRAZY to cancel school because its too cold, kids need to toughen up, we cant shelter our kids for the rest of their lives. When it comes to college they dont cancel school b/c its too cold, they are expected to go, but if they never had to go outside when it was 2 degrees then they wont know what to do.  Plus half the kids on days out of school they go outside and play anyway.
Ok I am done venting.... I just hate to sound like "an old person" but kids these days are getting too soft.

Friday, January 1, 2010

Week 35 and 3 weeks to go

So the last week and a half have been very emotionally eventful.  Not too mcuh going on with physical changes, besides a little more swelling if I am on my feet too long, but that is to be expected and actually should have happened weeks ago, so I cant complain.
Last week we went to the multiples specialist and said the twins are growing great. They are actually on track to grow at the same rate of a single pregnancy which is rare, but a great thing.  so at 34 weeks Caysen weighed 5lbs and Price weighed 5lbs 2 oz.  The only thing I didn't like to hear from our multiples specialist is he predicts I wont make it to Jan. 19th he thinks I will go a week early, which is still full term but its also the same wekk/day my regular Dr. orginally tried to schedule our C-section, but I wanted it to be later, so he moved it back as far as he felt semi comfortable with.  So even if I do go early like they predict I am ok with it-to a point, but me being stubborn I set a date and I want to make it to that date.  So I plan on using this weekend to finalize everything and the next two weeks, take bedrest really seriously and just lay around all day and week.
This week we went to our regular doctor, and they are still doing very well. They are starting to not like me laying on my back, even though to me that feels the best, because thats when I dont feel all the weight. But the reason the Dr said that is because their heart rates were a little higher 128 and 126, which isn't high but typically they are in the 110's because they cant move much. So that was interesting.  I have to admit I was al ittle bummed because every two weeks we take a blank DVD in for him to record the ultrasound, and he forgot to record it, but its not that bad, because its getting to a point now that you cant really see what anything is.  You can just mainly see their heads and get their heart rates.
So this next week I go back to the Dr. but I also have what they call, I believe, a bio physical exam.  Basically what they tell me this is, is they look at 8 different things from breathing of the babies, to amount of amniotic fluid, etc. and ideally I would get an 8 out of 8. So I have that on Wednesday and right after that I go to the Dr to go over the results.  I have a feeling what this basically is going to do is give them a better idea of if I can make it to the 19th or not, so I am crossing my fingers!!
Hopefully at the end of this weekend I will be able to put up pictures of the completed nursery, or atleast to my liking.  We still have the swing and everything that goes in different places in the house in the nursery so instead of looking like a nursery it looks more like a storage facility. But again hopefully its done by the end of the weekend... we will see.